• Rain on Fire

• 

  
  I've always been a fire, and everyone I loved walk away as ashes. 

• Until I meet a Phoenix who loves the fire, after this time burning itself on a funeral pyre and rising from the ashes with a renewed willpower to start again to love me unconditionally.
  
  

• Until then, I shall walk this road alone, trying everyday, taming my flame to be the warmth and comfort instead of burning everyone to cinders who gets attracted with my flickering light. 

• 
  If I fail to find my Phoenix, even I the fire, will burn its own fuel and one day this too will die and the smoke will reach out to heaven and disappear and will be no more but a memory.
  
  

• /SweetKalamansi Moment by Rain 01032016

• Disclaimer: Photos not mine. Kudos to those who own them.

Sarangbi (Love Rain)

Excerpt from the Kdrama: Love Rain

On a rainy evening I saw her
Oh how I wanted to find her for so long
She was without umbrella and I asked her
Come into my umbrella
I can hear the soft raindrops
I can hear my heartbeats.
I can hear the raindrops and heartbeats
I can hear the "Love Rain" falling
We walked the raining streets together
The small umbrella got my shoulder soaked
and she told me,...
You can come a little bit closer
I can hear the soft raindrops pounding the umbrella
I can hear the Love Rain falling
I love Rain & I Love you.

Love

Yes, Love.

It took me 47 years to finally know the definition of love.

I thought love is a 2-way street, that it's a feeling between two person.
or It's what keep them together because they found love.

I thought it's about what the other person can give you.....
To make you feel special, wanted, needed, desired, loved!

I thought, I have to work hard to be loved,
that I need to be Skinny, Pretty, Sweet & wonderful to even find it.

I thought I shall never have my true love, that it was not meant for me.

I was wrong.....way too wrong!

Love is what Jesus feels when He sacrificed His life on the cross...
Love is what God feels about us when He created us in His image.
Love is when we are forgiven for all the sin we have committed against God.

You don't need to be with another person to practice Love,
You don't to expect Love in return.

Love is giving love...love is what you can do to your neighbor..
Love is just love.....unconditional, not a two-way thing but a one-way street.

You will never find love if you keep on looking, because it's already in your heart....the more you seek it..the lesser you have it.

The more you are concerned about yourself, the more self centered you become, when you are selfish and negative about everything...you are suffocating Love.

Love is not a present to receive but a Gift to be given.

Give it away, and love will multiplies......

Love never dies....passion does, desire does, lusts does.

Love is eternal....

Love is not meant to be kept, it meant to be given. It's not a boomerang...the Love you have given cannot be taken back.

If you receive love, then the person loves you...that was not the love you have given.....it's theirs.

You don't have a choice or any right to complain when a person you care about stopped giving you love. It's their choice. Your choice is---will you keep on giving it or just stop too?

Is love a reward or a punishment?

You love a person not because they are good. You just love.

You never stopped loving someone because they changed, it is because you did.

Love has no color, no weight, no size, no price, it's free.

Love is freedom.
Love is happiness
Love is Joy
Love is caring
Love is giving
Love is helping others
Love is blind but it is not mute.
Love is sacrifice
Love is charity
Love is healing
Love is action
Love is Christ

Share it.

Here's yours, take it!

Thank you father God for the message today. Please help me remember it when I am being selfish and self centered. When I complain remind me Lord that Love begins with me and not the other way around. Thank you for Jesus. All Glory belongs to you Lord. praying in the might name of Christ. Amen.

LOVE, I.N.C.

/pamelarain 102914

THE FACE OF EVIL

I just saw this horrible image of a child who was raped and murdered by Four evil men.  My heart stopped beating for a bit, I stopped breathing for a while and then pain came, I have a splinter in my soul :`(((

When we see  graphic evidences that humans are basically evil, our comfort zone disappears, our hands reaches out to heaven and our souls yearns for a deeper connection with God. Questions resurfaces and we needed some blessed assurance that:

• ~Without our God watching over us, how can we survive this world?
• ~Without the Holy Spirit,  who can protect us from those who want to harm us and our children? 
• ~Without our Faith, what is the sense of all these hurt and pains?
• ~Without Love, I can't fathom how much harm we can do to others too. 
• ~Without Jesus, we shall all face the ultimate "death penalty".

Beware my brothers and sisters, do not falter....
Do not invite sin inside your heart, keep it clean and pure.
Do not play with fire thinking you'll not get burned, because you will.
God's people loves you not because you're good but because they ARE.

I am blessed because I am rescued, protected and loved. I am free to worship and express my Faith.

 Thank you Father God for showing me that even we are in the middle of chaos and evilness we have your love as our shield and nothing can harm us, for as long as our eyes are on You all the time. Thank you Jesus, Amen.

Psalm 91:1-16 ESV


"He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his pinions, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness is a shield and buckler. You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day"

Pamela Rain/082014

How Do You Like Your Eggs?

The power of knowing thyself starts with a simple question as--How Do You Like Your Eggs?

One of my favorite movie is the Runaway Bride by Julia Roberts and she was the character, Maggie.  On one of the scene, Maggie realized that she never knew how she likes her eggs, it always depends on her present fiancé‎ and somehow whatever the guy prefers, she will just take that as hers too, losing herself in that relationship until she don't know herself anymore and she will run away on the day of the wedding. Really sounds familiar. You can ask my...........

Anyway, back to the topic!

I enjoy my eggs in many different ways and it depends on my mood, BUT I have specifics on every way it was prepared!

First and foremost, I like BROWN eggs NOT white. I want them organics or "Fertile" just like God made them originally, from a mommy hen and daddy rooster:

• Scrambled: I want it with onions and it should be cooked enough and not runny but not too dry.
• Fried: I want it well done and the edges browned and the yolk really cooked well.
• Boiled: Now, this getting complicated..I want the egg to be: 

             a. Yolk should be in the middle - for this you need to have a thong holding it upright.

             b. I want the white part solid, and the yolk creamy - it's called 2-minute-egg 

• I will not eat "deviled-egg" unless you call them Angel-Eggs, you know.....................
• Egg Benedict is good but very seldom I make them because the hollandaise sauce is too rich
• Omelets - will save the day anytime but nahhhh...not really my fave...
• Korean Spa Eggs (Jjimjilbang 달걀 dalgyal) - Now, we're talking. I love them.

• Japanese Marinated Eggs (Ajitsuke Tamago) that they put on Ramen and other Noodle Soups

Wait.................................

We are only talking about eggs right? so, how can I possibly keep my sanity much more a relationship if I am this complicated?

Sigh.................................

Bottomline:

Yes, I know how I like my eggs.

I prayed and prayed for God's guidance and He answered my prayers, well----He already answered before but I kept on denying it and denying it and reasoned out and in the process, I got hurt...I got broken....cried, got mad, cried again and finally I reached the point that I finally realized that I don't have a choice but to accept it. God wants me to be focused on HIM and to be still and listen and know (and accept) that He is God and that He is total control. This year 2014 (and beyond), I decided that I will enjoy my solitude, my freedom and single-blessedness and follow Him. Oh Lord, yes! I am carrying my cross and the burden and the weight of it reminds me of how the Lord loves me and that I am His child, His heir. I refused my inheritance before and I got a splinter in my heart in the shape of a cross, reminding me everyday that I belong to Him and no one else's.

How about you my friend, How Do You Like Your Eggs?

/♥ℛ@!η♥@SweetKalamansi

The day of our Lord, 011714 

             

  

HAPPINESS

Originally posted from my Facebook account last January 5, 2013 at 1:26pm

Happiness is best described as an act of feeling exhilarated, it's when you're having a perfect moment. Happiness is fleeting and doesn't mean to last. It meant to be savored while it lasts. 

• Happiness is when you sleep at the sound of pouring rain.
• Happiness is snow flurries.
• Happiness is when you smell the fresh brewed coffee upon waking up.
• Happiness is when you see your child laughing..
• Happiness is the first touch of warm water in the shower on your body on a cold winter morn.
• Happiness is eating your favorite dessert.
• Happiness is getting a gift.
• Happiness is the first kiss between two lovers.
• Happiness is when you are with your friends.
• Happiness is when you have the first drink of cold water when you're thirsty
• Happiness is having sweet slices of watermelon on a hot summer day.
• Happiness is the taste of Manga at Bagoong.
• Happiness is when you found out somebody loves you.
• Happiness is when you smell a new laundered fabric.
• Happiness is hugs and kisses.
• Happiness is walking barefooted at the beach.
• Happiness is when you have the bathroom for yourself.
• Happiness is when you can walk naked around your home when you're alone. :))

 It doesn't take much to be happy, sometimes it's even free.

 Now Joy on the other hand.............Next Blog :)

PamelaRain/010513

/pamelarainpalad@sweetkalamansiblog all rights reserved 100513 

Picture is not mine, no infringement intended.

CALLOS A LA MADRILEÑA

 INGREDIENTS:

3 lbs of clean tripe, cut in bite size pieces
.5 lb of Bacon
2 Beef Trotters
1 chorizo de Bilbao
1/2 cup Sundried Tomatoes in Oil
3 bay leaves
1 Large Red Bellpepper
1 large onion
1 lb of Carrots, cubed
1 Sm. can of Tomato Paste
1 can of Garbanzo
1 can/cup of black olives (whole)
1 cup of Sweet Peas
3 Tbsp of minced garlic
Fish Sauce to Taste
Whole black pepper
1Tsp. Smoked Paprika Powder
Olive Oil

Cooking Procedure:

• In a casserole, put-in the onion, tripe and  trotters or feet, bay leaves, whole black-pepper, salt and water. Simmer until the  feet and tripe are extremely tender or you may use a pressure cooker for this step (pressure cook for about 45 minutes)
• Heat a large wok or pan then pour-in the olive oil, saute garlic and half of the bell pepper till fragrant.
• Add chorizo de bilbao and bacon then cook in medium heat for 5 minutes.
• Pour-in the tomato paste & sun-dried tomato and 2 cups of stock (water used to boil ox feet and ox tripe) and let it boil.
• Add the tender ox feet and tripe and simmer for 10 minutes.
• Add Fish Sauce to taste and paprika then put-in the carrots. Simmer until carrots are medium crisp.
• Put-in the garbanzo, black olives & Sweet peas then simmer for 10 minutes.
• Transfer to a serving dish & garnish with the remaining Bell-peppers
• Serve hot. Share and enjoy!

All Rights Reserved, Pamela Rain Brune @SweetKalamansi 090413

Kiss The Rain

I do not own the song, no infringement intended. I am just a fan of Yiruma and this song is the language of my heart. - Rain@SweetKalamansi

YIRUMA

I often close my eyes
And I can see you smile
You reach out for my hand
And I'm woken from my dream
Although your heart is mine
It's hollow inside
I never had your love
And I never will

CHORUS
And every night
I lie awake
Thinking maybe you love me
Like I've always loved you
But how can you love me
Like I loved you when
You can't even look me straight in my eyes
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsty.com/yiruma-kiss-the-rain-lyrics.html ]
VRS 2/3
I've never felt this way
To be so in love
To have someone there
Yet feel so alone
Aren't you supposed to be
The one to wipe my tears
The on to say that you would never leave

The waters calm and still
My reflection is there
I see you holding me
But then you disappear
All that is left of you
Is a memory
On that only, exists in my dreams

CHORUS

VRS 4
I don't know what hurts you
But I can feel it too
And it just hurts so much
To know that I can't do a thing
And deep down in my heart
Somehow I just know
That no matter what
I'll always love you

VRS 1

So why am I still here in the rain

My Black Mustang

Some horses are not meant to be broken,

Some horses are not meant to be ridden.

Some of them were born to be running wild and free,

Tie them up, stable them up they will just bolt and flee.

As much as I wanted you beautiful black Horse,

I have to go and change my course.

I will just admire you from a distance.

Hope from time to time you'd spare me a glance.

I tried my best to stand by your side,

To let me mount you and have a long ride.

But you never let go, you never trusted anyone,

I thought you've chosen me and I am that one.

What made you heart so cold?

What made you feel so old?

Run free then my proud black Mustang,

Life has been lived, Songs had been sung.

Time for you to leave, you can go now...

As for me, I still have to learn how...

To let go of my beautiful love,

I have chosen my wonderful God above.

/pamelarain 031413

Lyrics:


Childhood living is easy to do 
The things you wanted I bought them for you 
Graceless lady you know who I am 
You know I can't let you slide through my hands 
Wild horses, couldn't drag me away 
Wild wild horses couldn't drag me away 

I watched you suffer a dull aching pain 
Now you decided to show me the same 
No sweeping exits or off stage lines 
Could make me feel bitter or treat you unkind 
Wild horses, couldn't drag me away 
Wild wild horses couldn't drag me away 

I know I've dreamed you a sin and a lie 
I have my freedom but I don't have much time 
Faith has been broken tears must be cried 
Let's do some living after we die 
Wild horses, couldn't drag me away 
Wild wild horses we'll ride them someday 
Wild horses, couldn't drag me away 
Wild wild horses we'll ride them someday

The Promise

WORDS IN SILENCE

"Can you hear me now?......good!"


I am screaming inside, yet there was silence..
I want to break down and cry but there was no more tears.
You've finally broken my spirit, yet I am standing straight and tall.

I tried putting into words what my heart feels and I failed.

So in silence, I am letting you know the pain your words have caused.

Eventually you will hear my silence.
Eventually you will understand the unsaid words.
Eventually you will get to see the point you had easily dismissed.
Eventually you will say: "I am sorry...."

By then it will already be too late..

My soul already have shifted.

Today, I am giving my heart to the Lord for safekeeping.

If one day, you will look for me, seek God first.

The vow of silence starts now..........................................

Susan Boyle - Enjoy The Silence Lyrics

Artist: Susan Boyle

Album: Someone To Watch Over Me

Genre: Pop

Words like violence
Break the silence
Come crashing in
Into my little world

Painful to me
Pierce right through me
Can't you understand
Oh, my little one

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

Vows are spoken
To be broken
Feelings are intense
Words are trivial

Pleasures remain
So does the pain
Words are meaningless
And forgettable

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

GPS - God's Positioning System...RECALCULATING

I accidentally found this blog on my draft folder, I was surprised that I haven't published it yet until now. Maybe because it's too poignant, this was when my Dad died 10 months after Mom and my daughter went back home to attend the funeral and I was left alone drowning in my sorrows.

Here it is, sharing it to the world...it's part of who I am now and what I have become.

Going Down the drain

Have you heard about the saying "You are in the midst of a crowd yet you feel alone"?

Lately I've been experiencing that, as if I am getting nowhere, lost and abandoned.

The more I tried getting to that position where everything is going great..

The time before Mother fate have given birth to the twin tragedy that made my life upside down

and rock my world to the core..back to the time, I haven't had a taste of Death that close.

I lost my rock, the woman, my mother who can weather all the storms and strong gusts of winds

The one who worked 24/7 to make ends meet. The father I held dear to my heart my security, my love.

I've lost the energy, the motivation...

I even tried drowning all these by entering another relationship that only made it worst.

I expected too much and gave to much too soon...thinking it will drown all my sorrows.

But I was wrong....wrong....wrong...wrong!!

God is taking all my lifeline...He's putting me in a place of solitude..so I can be still and know that he is God.

To finally listen to him and listen well...He's not talking yet..because maybe I am not ready yet..

But I am starting to get the point.

GPS, still reads....RECALCULATING.

Sweet Kalamansi: STAR-CROSSED LOVERS

Sweet Kalamansi: STAR-CROSSED LOVERS: What do these couples have in common? ❤ Romeo and Juliet ❤ Anthony and Cleopatra ❤ Samson and Delilah of the Bible ❤ Tristan and Isolde...

STAR-CROSSED LOVERS

What do these couples have in common?

❤Romeo and Juliet
❤Anthony and Cleopatra
❤Samson and Delilah of the Bible
❤Tristan and Isolde (Iseult)
❤Paris of Troy and Helen of Sparta from The Iliad.
❤Oedipus and Jocasta of Oedipus
❤Hero and Leander - Greek Mythology
❤Lancelot and Guinevere of the Round Table
❤Zero and Iris of Megaman X4




They are all, Star-crossed lovers whose relationships ended, tragically..


❤ So, I guess I can include YOU and ME to the list.


"To me the term simply means, a tragic end to a love relationship. I don't believe in luck, fate, serendipity, or 
chance - I believe everything in life has a purpose, reason and meaning. I believe, two such people are not together because somewhere, at a higher spiritual level, they chose not to be together even though at the human conscious level, they tried to make it work. But the primary or root belief always exists at the spiritual level and it is what wins out in the end despite all the wishful thinking we might have, despite all of our desire for an alternate outcome - what the soul wants, the soul gets. That is where free will is at, that is where the choice is made, that is what will transpire. The rest of the story is just drama, unfolding petals of a flower we call tragedy. The soul does not know tragedy, it only knows that it experiences the results of its choices, without feelings, without remorse or regret. And as far as stars is concerned, is that anything like getting head on the head and seeing stars? When you think about things this way, you begin to feel more like a puppet than anything else...and just because you cannot see what is clearly going to happen, does not mean it will not, despite everything you do to the contrary" - JIM of Yahoo answers

                                                           "You Could Be Happy"

You could be happy and I won't know
But you weren't happy the day I watched you go

And all the things that I wished I had not said
Are played in loops 'till it's madness in my head

Is it too late to remind you how we were
But not our last days of silence, screaming, blur

Most of what I remember makes me sure
I should have stopped you from walking out the door

You could be happy, I hope you are
You made me happier than I'd been by far

Somehow everything I own smells of you
And for the tiniest moment it's all not true

Do the things that you always wanted to
Without me there to hold you back, don't think, just do

More than anything I want to see you, Boy
Take a glorious bite out of the whole world

LOVE, PERPETUAL.

What makes you feel secure? 

What makes you sleep through the night?

It's when you know whatever happens

Somebody is there for you..

Loving you, caring, praying, constantly.

Inconsistency brings out insecurities.

it makes you wonder, have doubts..

Your world teetering, wobbling, here & there.

It creates paranoia, suspicion & negativity.

"Constant" gives life a Rhythm...

Just like the Sun rises every morning..

Though it may get covered by clouds,

you know it's there above you.

Just like the wave touches the sand to and fro..

Constantly, non-stop...religiously.

Just like God's love!

He loves us without ceasing, day in--day out.

Just like the Love of mother to her child

Just like how fathers protect his family..

Non-STOP, never ending.

LOVE, should be like that.

it must be secure, unfailing & CONSTANT!

Note: Mother and child Painting is a gift from my sister Precious.

/sweetkalamansi101112

Why Does LOVE gotta hurt?

I once asked God...No, begged God for me to feel what love really is..
I was in a relationship that was DEAD and I felt nothing..I was a zombie..
wondering if Love really do exist? I used to believe everything I read.
That love is wonderful, it makes your life colorful...makes you feel the natural highs..
Just one glance, just one touch, just one smile and your world is complete.
I cried myself to sleep wishing for these to happen even just once before I die.
I was so lonely inside a relationship because all I have is a piece of paper and nothing more.

Then I met you..you fascinate me...I looked at my ideal list but you failed it..
But there was this feeling I can't explain...it's as if my universe was aligning around yours.
I feel giddy and excited just seeing your messages...all my senses are awakening...
I have feelings that were foreign to me...I was confused, I like them yet I hated them.
I am losing control...losing common sense...losing what I know that are best for me.
I fought the feeling...fought it hard...you see...you were not ideal for me. You are too cocky.
Too secretive...too shady..too hard...you are borderline heartless sometimes....yet...
Once in a while I will see a side of you that is sweet and thoughtful and love of family.
Those were the stuff that finally got me into thinking that maybe...just maybe you are more than
what you make me believe.

That first kiss....it was raining....it felt like I was melting..I never thought my heart was on ice
and it's thawing...it was painful and it felt good at the same time...my heart filled with this feeling that I thought was impossible, yet....it's there! the extra beat...I started analyzing myself and was denying it still..was it just chemistry? I was not attracted to you physically then but we had a good mental rapport.
It was from our first fight that I found out I was "in-love" I've been hurt in the past but it was not like that..I never felt that gut-wrenching pain so excruciating I was bawling my eyes out for the just the thought of not seeing you ever again...I fell madly, deeply kick-in-the ass in-love with you...

Loving you is like riding a roller coaster, ups and down, twist and turn...sometimes I felt like giving up.
I tried so many times to get away from you but it's like trying not to breathe...eventually I will give-in once more and take a good dose of oxygen. You are my drug, you are my poison, you kill me then you will kiss me to life again...and again...and again..

Is it worth it? all these pains and tears versus some days of love and laughter?
Is it worth getting to know what love really is?
Yes and NO...Though I am glad that I had the opportunity to "feel"....
I can't be on the roller coaster all my life..eventually the ride will end
and I will step on SOLID ground once more where I know myself better and live life as I know it.
I thank you though for the greatest ride of my life...it was exhilarating while it lasted.
I love you still and I think I will love you forever but I am done, baby.

I never thought Tragedy spells with: U..N..ME!

GRAVITY:

Lyrics:
Something always brings me back to you
It never takes too long
No matter what I say or do
I still feel you here 'til the moment I'm gone

You hold me without touch
You keep me without chains
I never wanted anything so much
Than to drown in your love and not feel your rain

Set me free, leave me be
I don't wanna fall another moment into your gravity
Here I am and I stand so tall
I'm just the way I'm supposed to be
But you're on to me and all over me

You loved me 'cause I'm fragile
When I thought that I was strong
But you touch me for a little while
And all my fragile strength is gone

Set me free, leave me be
I don't wanna fall another moment into your gravity
Here I am and I stand so tall
I'm just the way I'm supposed to be
But you're on to me and all over me

I live here on my knees
As I try to make you see
That you're everything I think I need
Here on the ground

But you're neither friend nor foe
Though I can't seem to let you go
The one thing that I still know
Is that you're keeping me down
You're keeping me down

You're on to me, on to me and all over
Something always brings me back to you
It never takes too long

CROSSROADS

A couple of days ago...I faced a crossroad.
There I was standing at the falling Rain
Facing the forks on the road.....
To my left here is this life that is easy and safe
Where I will live my dreams..
and to my right, a life that is rough and unstable
It was the hardest decision I ever made 
But I did it..


I wish I had a formula to calculate the sum
I wish I am a fortune teller, so I will know the future
But I only have my heart to guide me and nothing else.
So I chose the rough and unstable road..


I already started feeling the rocks beneath my feet
Feeling the hot rays of the sun and the cold blowing of the wind.
I can feel my heart beat the extra beat..the unhealed wound starts to bleed again.
My tears started falling until I am almost blinded by them..


Then I heard your call...
That familiar sound like music to my ears....
You met me halfway and the moment I smelled you, I was home.
It hit me then....YOU never left...you never gave up, good and bad.


I looked back the at road on my left...it was beautiful...
I saw him standing there where he stood...didn't moved at all
In his eyes I was a failure..I failed him..I am not up to par.
I was not perfect so he gave up....


And I smiled...I am glad I followed my heart.

created by: ☂♥Rain♥☂